Shop Cyber Monday Specials in Stealth-Mode
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You have exactly one week until it arrives: the seductive glory that is Cyber Monday. In the seven days leading up to this oh-so noble internet holiday, you will scour the far reaches of the web, questing for coupon codes and promotional deals – any hint of the monumental savings that are to come. But alas! The once-hidden secrets of Cyber Monday Specials have surfaced, and the world has become wise to your obscene savings. Many will be joining you this year.
So many, in fact, that your boss may be on the look-out for those deviant workers who would prefer discounts to data entry and savings to sales reports. If you are brave enough to face the wrath of your tyrant leader and take full advantage of Cyber Monday specials (this means shopping for longer than your obligatory thirty-five minute lunch) you had better start practicing the tricks of internet shopping on the sly. Fumbling to minimize the check-out screen of a monthly chocolate gift basket mid-transaction is the mistake of an amateur.
Bring in the big guns
For those serious about a full eight-hour work day dedicated solely to Cyber Monday Specials (and perhaps a few other internet dalliances…Facebook anyone?) there are software programs designed specifically to hide your slacker ways. These programs format your keyboard to have a “Boss Key” which, when pushed, will magically erase the evidence of all the great Cyber Monday sites and leave only an innocent Excel spreadsheet to fill your screen.
Fool them with your fancy fingerwork
Not quite ready for that kind of commitment? Those who possess fast and fleeting fingers will love some of the keyboard features that will flip from great Cyber Monday Specials back to your email with naught but a few nimble keystrokes. PC users will want to start getting used to Alt+Tab to toggle between open applications and Windows+D for snappy screen changes. Mac users can get the same results using Open Apple+Tab and the F11 key. No unwieldy mouse-work necessary.
Do it in plain sight
If you’re worried that relying on the old screen switcharoo is going to get you caught in the act, there is nothing like a little old-fashioned feigning to bewilder a boss or nosy co-worker. Drumming your fingers on the table, clicking outrageously on your mouse, and random expletives cursing a bothersome client are your first steps to acting the over-worked post-holiday employee you actually are. Re-size your browser so your Cyber Monday perusing of DVDs and books all fits in the guilt-free window of your email preview. In addition, certain web browsers such as Firefox have features to strip web pages of their distinctive features. From “View,” scroll down to “Page Style” and then “No Style” and poof! You’re looking at what could very well be an interesting email attachment on the 2010 merger. No one is the wiser.
Keep in mind that if your boss already suspects you of your wily shopping ways, all it takes is a simple request to IT to monitor your computer’s activity for the day. And in that case, none of these tips will help. So if you’re on your third warning, you might want to be proactive and get yourself a bad cold the the night before Cyber Monday hits.
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